Posted in Sharing

One Step Back

Progress, not perfection as is stated in our Book
Is what we must pursue; therefore, we need to take a look
At how we are progressing, use the 10th Step as our guide
Evaluate our actions to insure we don’t backslide

To backslide does not only mean we took another drink
More times than not it happens by the way we sometimes think
Our defects or our shortcomings we prayed to take away
Keep coming back when we relent, our old ways on display

When we attend a meeting, for that hour we’re secure
Surrounded by our fellowship, no hardships to endure
It’s when we travel out that door the challenge will begin
It may be from some stranger or perhaps our next of kin

We go to an appointment that was set to start at nine
It’s nearly 10 and we still sit, we feel we’ve been maligned
Our thoughts become unsettled; agitation now increased
We produce a verbal insult, old behavior’s been released

We’re asked to just be patient since the doctor we’re to see
Was tending to a patient with a real emergency
So, we sit down and start to think about the way we acted
And how we let the teachings from our Program get distracted

We took a small step backwards, did not think or did not care
To use a thing that we’d been taught, the first part of a prayer
To accept this thing we could not change, ‘twas out of our control
So, say the prayer and reconnect with patience as our goal

It matters not how long it’s been since last we had a drink
Impatience, aggravation still can change the way we think
It’s what we do when this occurs, a choice we have to make
One leads back to serenity, the other to mistakes

The one step back can not be change so what we need to do
To compensate for what we’ve done, we need not one but two
Two steps forward to get us back to where we need to be
Back on the journey we began towards our serenity

The first step is to recognize our part in what we did
Discard the though that we’d been wronged, stop acting like a kid
And once we’ve understood our part, our conscience to inspect
We need to take some action for this issue to correct

To promptly say that we were wrong is difficult to do
Ego tells us, “Don’t go there”, a childish point of view
Our program tells us that we must amend for our misdeeds
Acknowledge our misconduct and be willing to proceed

Apologize to those we have offended or aggrieved
Clear the air of tension that our actions had conceived
It takes both steps to rectify the prudence that we lack
Each time we let resentment let us take that one step back

Larry R.

Posted in Sharing

Could This Be The Bottom?

Bottle in my left hand,
shovel in my right…
I’m digging perilous pit.
I’ve dug in so deep,
I don’t see the light…
Maybe it’s time that I quit?

Alone I sit in this piteous pit,
a decision I was to make…
Do I climb out from under,
or be buried in it?
How much more of this can I take?

A pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization…
There’s only but a few paths to follow.
I’ve been given the gift of desperation…
Admitting defeat’s hard to swallow.

I asked for His care and protection, soon a ladder appeared…
12 simple steps to make my connection,
it was time I faced all I feared.

I climbed the steps from this now propitious pit,
bottle and shovel I dropped…
You’ll know when it’s time when your bottom is hit,
the moment the digging has stopped.

Gordon R.

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The Garden of Serenity

There is a place I like to travel…
When life becomes too much for me
A mystic place where I unravel…
It’s called the Garden of Serenity

This is the place I like to go…
When I’m seeking solitude
To dial it down and take it slow…
To adjust my attitude

No other place like this I know…
To stop and smell the roses
To get away from status quo…
This garden never closes

Close your eyes and drift away…
Free your minds debris
Take a mental holiday…
A moment of reprieve

Here there is no confrontation…
A place you can reflect
A calming, peaceful destination…
A chance to reconnect

In the Garden of Serenity…
There are no butterflies, bugs, or bees…
No flowers, shrubs, or trees
No grass in which to grow…
Not a single blade
No streams or rivers flow…
No water which to wade

It’s here I go for meditation…
A place where I find clarity
A tranquil place of contemplation…
The Garden of Serenity

Gordon R.

Posted in Sharing

Another Day

Thank you God for another day
Please lead me as I go on my way…
On my own I am lost
On my own I know the cost…
If there are storms that darken my path
I know trust in you will weaken their wrath…
I ask for love and tolerance for all
In this endeavor let me not stall…
When I take back the reins as I know I will
Help me to pause and be still…
And once again may Your hand guide me along
As my faith in You keeps me strong…

Bill D

Posted in Sharing

Alcohol’s Grip

You keep calling my name
But I know it won’t ever be the same
Once you made me feel on top
Then came the day I could not stop
Hands a tremblin,covered in sweat
Till once again we met
Days and nights all a blur
That’s just how things were
Try to stop, life I could not face
So off to oblivion I would race
Friends and family I did not care
You left me with no feelings to spare
All I wanted was sweet sweet relief
In return you took all of me like a thief
Of course the time came you gave relief no more
You had nothing left for me, yet I wanted more
I begged stop the pain
As my tears fell like rain
What could this be but pure insanity
Ask for help, what about my vanity
Where do I go from here
Which way do I steer
So full of fear
I want outta here
Don’t wanna live don’t wanna die
Feels as if its all a lie
Tired of the fight
Just ain’t right
I must stop just give in
Is the only way to win
Surrender my will
Peace I’ll feel

Bill D.

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What Humility Means To Me

In the opening paragraphs of the chapter devoted to step seven in The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, Bill Wilson emphatically states, “the attainment of greater humility is the foundation principle of each of AA’s twelve steps.” The legendary alcoholic goes on to claim that, “…without some degree of humility, no alcoholic can stay sober at all.”  This can be a daunting task in modern day culture, where humility is often associated with weakness, or an almost passive mode of existence.  Society puts so much emphasis on external accomplishments, appearance, and arrogance that even a small display of humility can make one feel like a drowning man coming up for air.  Like many alcoholics, I struggled to define this quiet virtue.  How can I begin to live by these principles if I can’t interpret them myself?  At the suggestion of Bill W. and my sponsor, I set out to find my own meaning.

All too often, alcoholics set out to seek humility by thinking less about themselves when in reality they should be thinking about themselves less.  By following these guidelines, I have determined that humility means that you are secure enough not to need to be reassured by others.  It means that you don’t feel you have to prove yourself by showing that you are more cleaver, smarter, more gifted or more successful than others.  You are secure because you live in God’s love. For he has faith in you even if you do not.  You do not need to compare yourself to others.  You have your task, they have theirs, and that leads you to co-operate, not compete.

This means you can see other people and value them for what they are.  They are not just a series of mirrors at which you look only to see your own reflection.  Secure in yourself, you can see value in others.  Confident in your identity, you can value the people not like you.  Humility is the self turned outward. It is the understanding that it is not about you.

If you set yourself on human approval, you’re controlled by the people you want to please.  I was a walking example of this and this is why I drank.  You become overly concerned with what people think of you and begin to shape your behavior around gaining their approval.  The result is that you lose your sense of who you really are and you start compromising your principles.

So I challenge you, free yourself of the stronghold of society and find your own definition of humility.  Let’s walk this road together!

Stephan B.

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The deal that God makes with us Alcoholics/Addicts

A drunk is walking home, feeling sick and hurt. He is at that magic moment of surrender.

On his way he sees God and notices He has something in his hand. The drunk asks “What’s that?” God responds “This is sobriety”. The drunk said “Oh man, I need that! Geez, I need sobriety. How much does that cost?” as he only understands buying things. God returns with “How much do you have?” The drunk says “I have about 20 dollars.” God responds “All right, for you, sobriety costs 20 dollars.” The man, trying to back out of says, “If I give you all twenty dollars, I won’t be able to buy any gas for my car.”

God responds “Oh! so you have a car? I’m sorry, but sobriety is going to cost you your car.”
“Whoa, whoa!” Says the man. “If I give you my car, how am I going to get to my job?”

“You have a job?!” Exclaims God. “No, no, no. Sobriety is going to cost you your job.”
The drunk responds “But, if I give you my job, how am I to pay for my house?” House!!

You have a house!?” God says with surprise. “I thought you lived in a cardboard box under the bridge! Your file is completely out of date! Sobriety is going to cost you your house.”

The man responds “If I give you my house what about my wife and kids?”

“A family! That’s right, you have a family! Yes, yes. Sobriety is going to cost you your family.

The drunk responds “But if I give you all that, what good is my life?”

God states “That’s right. Sobriety costs you your life.”

The alcoholic, because he is at that magic moment of surrender is willing to give his God his money, and his car, and his job, and his house, and his wife and his kids, and his life and for that God gives him sobriety.

Then God looks him deep in the eyes and says:

“All right. I’m going to give you your money back but, it’s not your money anymore, it’s my money. I’m going to let you spend it for me.”

“I’m going to give your car back but, it’s not your car anymore, it’s my car. You get to drive it for me.”

“I’m going to give you your job back but, it’s not your job anymore, it’s my job. You get to work at it for me.”

“I give your house back but, it’s not your house anymore, it’s my home. But, you get to live in it for me.”

“I give your family back to you but, it’s not your family anymore, it’s my family. You get to take care of them for me.”

“I give your life back but, it’s not your life ever again. But, you get to live it for me.”

That’s the deal a loving God makes with us in the 3rd step.

Pham C.

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A King named Alcohol

There is a King named Alcohol…
He rules throughout the land
All he rules will surely fall…
Under the influence of his command

Behind the gates of insanity…
Is where his kingdom lies
The scorch of all humanity…
The king of your demise

Sip by sip he slithers in…
And soon he takes control
Drip by drip he will begin…
To rape you of your soul

He leaves behind a destructive path…
He spreads misery and pain
All he rules soon feels his wrath
Darkness follows this Kings rein

This evil King of whom I speak…
Does not discriminate
The young the old the strong the weak…
Fall prey for him to take

Recoil from gifts this King brings…
The most cunning King of all
More baffling and powerful than all the other Kings…
This King named Alcohol.

Gordon R.